ne big question: Why do you go to college? Because you were finally pushed out of high school and found yourself with four free years? Yes, that is certainly a basic part of your motivation. However, you also go because your parents keep saying to you, “There is nothing more important than a college degree. Without it, you will end up playing the saxophone in a bus station. No, that’s not true. Playing a saxophone in a bus station calls for talent. Without it, you’ll be sweeping up there.”
 

In my books, I, like most parents, talk about the trials of urging my children to do well in school so they can go on to college. It has not always been easy. In fact, it has often been damned hard. I can smile a lot about it now because I use my humor to “motivate” young people who, much of the time, won’t listen to their elders in the first place. I am astonished at how poor communication is between young people and their parents regarding their children’s aspirations and concerns.
 

For me, however, college was my second choice. My first choice was to go to Rio, but I only had the money to reach Atlantic City. And I got some financial aid from college, but none was being offered by Rio.
 

But before we can talk to our kids seriously about going to college, we need to shepherd them through high school. Studies show a correlation between inadequate schooling and a wide range of distressing outcomes, including early death, a propensity for violence, and substance abuse. Given the dropout rate at many urban high schools, it is easy to understand why the social fabric has become tattered.
 

Change can only be set in motion when families and leaders get together and acknowledge that a problem exists. Where are the standards that tell a child: “Stop! There is hope.” This has to happen in the home. It reverts back to parenting. We must make a renewed commitment to our children, and that means parents must show that they value education. We must demand that our youth have an understanding of spoken and written English, math and sciences. Parent power! Guaranteed to induce self-empowerment.
 

Although we do our best to inspire our children to succeed on their own, the motivation for good work always has to come from inside them. Parents can insist that their offspring come home from school at three-thirty, but we can’t go to their rooms and stand there to make sure that they immerse themselves in the traditional three R’s instead of rhythm, rap and rock’n’roll.

Young people in our culture are bombarded with the concept of instant gratification like never before. Many elements of pop culture can give you a quick temporary high, but you have to remember that they don’t take you very far down the road to long-term achievement. More and more people seem to be saying “I want what I want, and I want it now.” News flash: people aren’t born with a house, two cars, and all the perks of modern middleclass life. They earn it, and for most of them, it takes time.
 

Bill Cosby during an appearance on

The Ellen Degeneres Show.

Another modern day problem is having “the victim attitude.” Children raised in an atmosphere where they are told they are inferior because of their skin color, family background, or socioeconomic class express self-doubt by asking themselves questions like: “Do I have the ability?” “Can I really succeed?” This lack of self-confidence identifies a person who does not feel capable of taking charge of his or her own fate, who is just one step from acting like a complete victim. Victims, we know, feel helpless and behave as if their destiny were completely controlled by others. At his worst, a victim does not accept responsibility for himself but always blames others for his predicaments and failures. A victim attitude is epitomized by the black student who fails her physics exam and blames it on the professor’s racism even though she did not study for the examination. Victims are passive and quite adept at finding excuses for their personal failures.

who made things happen. They did not allow the self-negation often associated with oppression to shackle their vision.
 

For success in any field, a “take charge” approach is absolutely necessary. The success of African-Americans in sports is the result of their taking control of their fate. Sports figures provide the pattern for an approach that is critical to whatever goals we pursue. Good players reach the top because they work hard and practice for many hours to perfect their skills, to become the best. They do not settle for average.
 

Bill Cosby during an appearance on

The Tonight Show with Jay Leno

But many students, even at top universities, are satisfied with a mediocre performance as long as they obtain the degree, the credential. Indeed, if students put forth the effort in their studies that athletes devote to excelling in sports, we would all be much better off. It is not enough just to get a credential, whether from Harvard or Howard. Everyone faces stiff competition in the real world of work. You cannot afford to be just average. The master word is education –– education with maximum effort. With that, you can attain your highest ambitions.
 

I have always put the highest value on education. However, one day several years ago, my daughter announced that she had decided not to go to college because she was in love with a boy named Alan. At first, my wife and I went crazy. Then, a light went on in one of the musty corners of my mind; her decision would save me a hundred thousand dollars.
 

A father like me with five children faces the terrifying prospect of paying to send five to college. When my oldest one went, the bill for her first year was thirteen thousand dollars. I looked hard at this bill and then said to her, “Thirteen thousand dollars (which has since risen to more than twenty, and is still going up) is more than just a sum of money. It requires a winning lottery ticket.
 

Many high school students worry too much about handling college, about whether they have the motivation, ability, time, and money. Some worry so much that they talk themselves out of going to college and having a chance at a better life by selling themselves short. I donate a lot of money to colleges because I realize that there is no substitute for a good education.
 

Paying for college can seem pretty scary when you don’t have much money to start with. Don’t let that fear stop you, though. There are many, many scholarships and loan programs to assist students in a variety of circumstances. Talk to the guidance counselors at your high school or visit the financial aid offices of the colleges you are considering attending. Most schools also include work-study programs to help you earn part of the money while you are taking classes. It may take hard work, but it is worth it.
 

Of course, once my daughter decided not to get married and to continue her education, I was delighted. Marriage is a wonderful thing, but college is a must these days. Our rapidly changing society is becoming more and more technological. I went to Temple, just after the end of the Ice Age, when the routine for a student was very different from the hi-tech college life of today. I don’t know how to configure a hard drive. To me, a hard drive is the Long Island Expressway; but the computer is where you will be living and maybe finding someone to help you make your way through the scary world.
 

College is more than just dumping another drone into the workplace. College is a rite of passage. Take courses that might have some connection to something. And, keep an eye on the real world after college. The real world is a reversal of college in so many ways. You will no longer have Fridays off, you will now go to a library to check out only books, and you will no longer eat in a place where the food should be served to dolphins. Moreover, in the real world, your social life will be dramatically different because it will involve you with people whose approach on campus sent you ducking for cover.
 

In the current employment market, it is extremely difficult and virtually impossible to make any kind of living with only a high school diploma. When you get a college education, you open up a world of possibilities. If you don’t, you are slamming a door on your future. You may think you’re a talented high school graduate, bright and energetic. You can learn “on the job.” True. But without a college degree, you may never get the chance. A college degree is the most important investment in both time and money you will ever make. It is one which will bring to your life a richness and value that is beyond measure.